Cannot Be Saved
by ZiZi-Chan
Summary: The story of Deidara, up to the time of his death. Because life is fleeting. I do not own Naruto, anything you find here is how I like it so there are no mistakes unless I mess up on Japanese.
1. Chapter 1

You guys want to know why I've been taking so long and disappearing? It's because ideas like this come to my mind and I can't focus on much until i write it all out, I'm sorry for not finishing my other story chapters, but I DO WORK ON THEM

I do not own Naruto.

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Ir was a quiet May fourth, the city of Iwa was still peacfully sleeping at the time of 8:04 am. The Hokage, however, had resided in his office, slowly working on the large amount of paper work that had started to bend his desk awkwardly. As he sifted through the papers, he had begun to notice that most were from the Hokage of Konoha. A scowl was deepening on his face as he remembered the terror that was brought upon konoha, the fox junchuuriki. It had cost Konoha nearly half of the city, and they were now in a massive amount of debt and needed help. Their Hokage had an idea; They send food to Iwa, Iwa sends back gold and silver. It was certainly a good idea, but previous trades between the two lands had been defected due to problems the two had.

There was a knocking at the door.

"Yes?" The old mans gruff voice bellowed out, setting down the papers gently.

"Tsuchikage." The quite voice of a guard whispered as he opened the large door to the office gently, the hinges creaking as the old man nodded for him to come in. He gave a bow before speaking again. "Tomorrow, it is may fifth, correct?" The elder nodded simply to this, raising his brows. What could tomorrows date be of any importance? "The young one. Will he..?" The guard looked down as if embarrassed. "Forgive me for asking such a juvenile question, but the young one demands to know if you will celebrate with him on his birthday tomorrow?" The guard was short and wearing his Iwa headband around his shoulder, his brown hair pulled back with a braid.

The Tsuchikage raised his brows at the guard, setting down the piece of paper he had previously been looking at. He stared at the guard in an almost uncomfortable silence, the guard shifting around and fixing his headband, even though it didn't need to be re-adjusted. The old man smirked and leaned back in his chair. "Deidara. He wants me at his birthday party?"

"Hai." The guard nodded, blushing furiously. "He demanded me ask you."

The old Tsuchikage seemed to ponder the idea, cupping his chin into a palm. The guard shifted his weight and coughed awkwardly into one of his hands. Onoki had never seen the guard before, so he assumed him to be new to this, perhaps just becoming a jounin. He looked no older than fifteen maybe. "What is your name, young man?" The kage asked the young man.

"Huh? Oh, Rin, Tsuchikage." He seemed nervous to be around the short Kage and kept fiddling with his hands. Onoki chuckled at the teens anxiety and jumped from his seat. The young man shook as the kage advanced on him. The kage studied him, causing the boy to nearly vibrate. Onoki laughed and the guard nearly jumped out of his own pants when the old man patted his back.

Ah, Rin, huh? Tell me, when were you ordered to become a guard?" He seemed too skittish to do such a demanding job.

"I-I am only temporary for one of the bottom floor men who became sick." The rubbed his shoulder, avoiding eye contact.

The kage raised a brow. Perhaps he would have some fun. He began to circle the young teen slowly. "Well, Rin, What did my Deidara do to make you come and interrupt my very important business work? Perhaps he brushes your hair too violently? Ah, My boy does enjoy playing with hair, is that how you got this braid?" He tugged the hair gently. The boy yelped.

The guard blushed, obviously not knowing the man was teasing. "Well, actually, Sir uh Kage-"

The old mans eyes darkened as he crept around the young man. "Or did he perhaps threaten to make you play with clay with him? Perhaps i should permanently ground him for making you fear him so much."

"Well, sir I-"

"Ah, Rin, my boy I'm just messing with you!" He laughed at his own teasing, the newbie guard letting a sigh from his chest. "Now, I must ask why you are scared of me? It's not as though I plan on doing anything to you!" He went to pat the boy on his back again but haulted when he noticed the boys face turning deathly pale. "Oi, what's wrong with you? Are you alright?!"

"Please don't make him give me hand mouths!" The guard suddenly fell to his knees and began sobbing. Onoki gaped as the boy began to kiss his feet . Pitying the boy (The smell couldn't be that wonderful) he stepped away and knelt down.

"Boy, Calm down! What in the world-"

"The blonde, he said he would curse me with hand mouths if I didn't do what he said!" The boy held out his palms and pointed to the middle "He even showed me the ones he gave himself! Disgusting little things!"

Onoki screwed his face into a scowl. He pulled Rin up by his braid and attempted to focus on other things besides the snot running down the boys lip. "I'll have you know that Deidara was born with those. There is not possible way he can give you a 'hand mouths curse'."

Rin looked confused for a moment, wiping his face of the tears and snot. "But..."

The Tsuchikage crossed his arms and shook his head. "That boy, he's always causing trouble. Do not worry about him, I shall talk to him." The kage thought for a moment. The boy was in for a good scolding for scaring Rin like he did. He looked at the guard and smiled. "Do you perhaps know where he is?"

The teen nodded, confusion still plastered his face. "He is in the kitchen if memory serves right."

The old man rubbed his nose and stifled a chuckle that was bound to come from him. He turned on his heel and looked out of the large windows. Ah, so the boy was already nagging the cooks about a cake and other pleasantries for tomorrow. He chuckled inwardly at the thought of the boy demanding a feast. His body looked like it couldn't hold a whole rice ball and he would probably eat the whole cake along with most of the other meal. Onoki paused at his thinking, noticing he hadn't even thought of scolding the boy. He looked back once more at Rin, who still seemed slightly shaky. "Rin, if you would go get Deidara for me. Tell him that I wish to speak with him about his party if he asks why."

The young guard nodded and began walking to the door slowly.

"Ah, and Rin?" The Kage called out.

The boy turned around. "Yes, Kage-sama?"

The old mans' face had turned stern. "You must learn to be strong. There is a difference between being respectful and fearing someone." He closed his eyes and shooed the boy with his hand. "Please go get Deidara."

"Hai, Tsuchikage-sama." The guard said, bowing before leaving the room. The door shut gently and Onoki went back to doing his paperwork, if only for a few moments.

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The kitchen of the Tsuchikage temple was large, the walls made of rock, as that was the only non perishable object the town of Iwa could use in abundance. The walls were smooth and thick. Nearly everything in the kitchen was made of some type of sturdy stone, even the stove was just rock with metal wires to hold food above a fire. Anything that came from it was not elegant, but Suchi attempted to make everything that came from the stove worth the wait. on top of the stove were holes that exhausted heat for pots that would boil rice or noodles. The rock stove was very long, as sometimes the Tsuchikage would hold meetings and afterwards they would need food. It aggravated her, Iwa already had a hard time accessing food and other produce. She sighed as she picked up a tiny bowl of dough. she was going to make noodles.

Across the stove was a long counter and a sink. There, on top of a wooden stool, was a young boy. He was staring down Suchi as she prepared the evenings meal. The woman was old, perhaps the eldest of the people that made their home in Iwa. "Would help me, Deidara-kun?" She asked the little boy. His head nodded, the golden locks that contrasted with the dull stone waving about. She handed him a ponytail for the hair. It was nearly as long as the boy himself. The boys gloved hands worked diligently at pulling the hair back. He beamed up at her when it was and she sent a small smile back.

There was a light on the ceiling that kept it from being dark, but sometimes Suchi felt as though Deidara was the brightest thing in the world.

She knew the boy didn't actually want to help, it wasn't his mission today, no.

She eyed the boy as he messily worked the dough. Cocking her hip, she asked "Isn't tomorrow May fifth?"

The boy froze and his eyes widened and a smile was beginning to show through his small mouth. He nodded nonchalantly. "Yes, ma'am, un."

She smirked. Ah, so polite all of a sudden. This was not the Deidara she was used to seeing. Usually the boy was up to no good, running around the halls and causing poor people stress. One of her assistants had even quit due to one of his pranks.

She could see the boy wiggling around and she laughed gently at his sloppy noodle making. He looked up slightly pitifully, large blue eyes pouting. "Ah, it's okay. here, give me that." She reached for the boys work and took it, adding the bunch to her own. "It takes time to become as good as me." she looked around for a moment.

"Oh dear, don't tell me I forgot to boil water." The old woman sighed, grabbing a pot and filling it with water. "I'm sorry Deidara, food will take longer than I thought.." she tapped her chin after setting the pot on one of the stoves holes. She pulled a slate from the stove and a release of stem swept into the air. "I do suppose it gives me time to work on your birthday cake though."

The boys face snapped up into a grin. "Really, un!?"

She laughed as the four year old leaned onto the counter. "Of course! Now don't think I wouldn't make a cake!"

There was a cough and both looked to the person who had intruded onto their conversation. The boys eyes widened as Rin, the guard he had previously patronized, looked to him. Almost scowling.

"The Tsuchikage want's to see you, Deidara-kun." Rin informed the blonde politely, still looking equally, if not more, unhappy. "About, your birthday party.

Deidara promptly left, jumping from the tall stool and ran from the room, the long ponytail flying after him. Before he was out of sight though, He turned to Rin and stuck out his tongue. Rin growled.

"Oh now why are you looking at the boy like he just stole your underpants?" Suchi asked the teen, who was glaring down the hallway.

Rin clenched his fists. "He's such a brat."

The old woman turned to the water and shrugged. "Most kids are."

"He embarrassed me in front of the Tsuchikage." He growled.

"Oh do not be immature, he is turning six tomorrow." She reached for the noodles and poored them into the boiling water. "Now, would you help me with this? Or will you worry about a young boy who merely played a prank on you?"

Rin looked shocked."How did you know?"

"Oh I just assumed. He does it to everyone." She laughed as she remembered him playing dead inside the stove. "Almost thought I cooked him once. Turns out the boy is good with his hands, painted his body to make him look burnt as over cooked bread."

Rin choked on a laugh. "He used his hand mouths on me." he said, taking a spoon and stiring the noodles as she dumped herbs in the pot.

The old woman turned to him in confusion. "Hand mouths? What in Kamis name are you talking about?"

It was then that Rin realized that maybe it was best not to mention anything about that. He rubbed the back of his head and waved the other, as if to shoo away what he just said. "Oh, just something silly."

Suchi shook her head. "Ah, kids these days. Never know what they're talking about." She walked to a wall of the kitchen that had cupboards aligning it, and somehow opened the correct one to find what she needed. Rin stepped back and let the old woman do her work. "Now watch closely, one day I'm not going to be here for this place and someone is going to have to know how to cook a decent meal."

It was a bunch of complicated steps that Rin couldn't fully understand, but Suchi promised that he would get it. They worked for a good twenty minutes on the soup before Suchi spoke again.

"What does Onoki really want with the boy?"

Rin supposed it had to do with revealing his hands to him. Onoki had looked to pleased at the boys prank on him. "Just his birthday, Deidara really wants him to come and celebrate at the party."

Suchi sighed. "Ah, yes. I would hope so. He seems to be so overworked lately though, with what happened in Konoha."

Rin nodded. "Terrible."

The old woman sighed. "I just don't see how people can become so..."

"Evil?"

"It's the world, it changes people." She sighed, answering her own question.

* * *

"ONOKI!"

Onoki laughed as the door to his office was slammed open by the tiny body of Deidara, his blonde hair up, nearly getting caught in the door as he slammed the door shut once more. "Ah, My boy! How are you?" He held out his stubby arms as the blonde ran to him and jumped into his lap. "Changing your hair style i see?" He flicked the boys nose, making the tiny sniffer scrunch up.

Immediately, the hair was released and once more it was everywhere. "No, un! I was helping Suchi san!" He smiled as if he had fed the poor.

"Ah, good. She is getting older, she needs big strong men like you to help her!" He laughed as the boy began to wriggle around, nearly popping the old mans large nose with his elbow.

"Onokiiiii! My birthday! Are you coming? Did the guard " He smiled hopefully, leaning in to the Tsuchikage.

"Now why would I miss such an important day?" Onoki grinned and ruffled the thick hair. Blue, icy eyes were wide with happiness.

"Yay, un!" He laughed.

"But first we need to talk, Deidara."

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"Do you see now?" Onoki had not meant to hurt the boy, it was the last thing he had wanted to do. And yet, here he was, looking down at the young blonde who was now sitting crossed legged. His palms were face up and his shirt off. His black gloves were sitting beside his legs and two tongues were now peaking from his tan palms. His chest was showing off a much larger mouth that had been sewn shut, only the slightest of occasional twitches that showed that the deformity alive. Tears were running down the boys cheeks and staining them. The blonde nodded, his hair falling in front of him.

"Nobody will accept you if you show them your disfigurements. They will torture you until the day you die. I do not want that for you." He touched the boys chest, moving away when it began to shift around. "They will say you do not have a heart." Then he pointed to the small hands. "They will not let you touch them, they will be disgusted. People will say things about you that you do not want to hear, and it will hurt."

"But, they are a part of me, I can't help it, un!" He cried out. He choked on the tears that weighed on his throat, the ones he wanted to hold back.

"You may have to be alone to keep yourself a secret."

He wanted to say that he didn't want to be a secret, he wanted to be normal, but at that moment his hands had touched and made a gurgling noise, their tongues strewn together in saliva, wetting the boys hands. He caught a glint of disgust in the old mans eyes and covered his hands with the black gloves.

Onoki knew he had crushed the boy then, he knew it would hurt, but he would become used to the feeling of being alone. Deidara only needed himself.

He gave the boy his shirt and led him to the door. Deidara pulled the cloth over his head, his feet dragging along the rock floor.

"I'll see you at your birthday party, Deidara kun." The boy turned to give the old man a smile, but the office doors closed on him before he could.

It was only a few minutes of the old man speaking, but it in those few moments, Deidara had learned quite a few things. He had felt so many emotions, more than he thought he could have in one five minute session between the man he considered his father.

"I hate you." He mumbled, walking away from the Tsuchikages' office.

No words could hold more feeling, more meaning to him than anything he had ever slipped from his lips.

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	2. Chapter 2

I want to thank the people who reviewed on my new story so far. Thank you.

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Onoki was becoming a stressed old man, his attempts at finding a way to feed his people had been becoming an increasing problem. He had agreed to the trade a year ago between Iwa and Konoha, but the land had demanded much more silver and gold than Iwa could provide and the trade had been once again paused as he demanded fair trade from Konoha. The land had yet to reply. Onoki had become strict and rigid to his people, demanding the best from them. He was a proud kage, but still, they needed food.

A good military was not going to work at it's best when hungry and although ninja were used to going a while without food, he also had normal citizens. Hungry citizens. Over the years, the towns population had tragically reduced thirty percent, the bad parts of Iwa hit the most with starvation, ghettos an becoming a pitiful reminder.

Onoki considered demolishing it at times.

Other than the supply of food, Iwa was excelling in its military. Still one of the biggest super powers in the land, he had more than surpassed Suna and Mist in terms of skill and weapons, creating new techniques. He had a vast amount of pride in his ninja, developing the explosion corps finally. He had even been able to get Rin to become one of the top in the division. They trained from afar, deep in the mountains where only the echo of explosions could be faintly heard from Iwa. It was tough, but everyone in that division was worthy of such work.

Of course Iwa had rivers that ran through the rock, so fishing was big, but the amount of fish caught on a daily basis would not be enough to trade with Suna, who was probably too poor to even think of trade.

Onokis' refused to trade with mist, the land was too difficult and their propositions had been sketchy (they had offered a trade, yes). The mist also was notoriously known for their many gangs and violence was popular among the area.

Onoki let a sigh escape his chapped lips. He was running out of options.

It was not often that in the mountainous city of Iwa, that anybody would see a bird- a pigeon nonetheless! Deidara watched intently from the windowsill of the room that he had moved into when he had first been dropped off. The bird was gray and the right side of its body was ruffled, feathers afluff and one leg at a slightly awkward angle. It limped from one side of the sill to the next, occasionally cocking its head at Deidara and then pecking at the glass, making the seven year old flinch back. He had been watching the new animal closely, so close that a fog had set onto the window. For years he had read books about animals, birds being of the favorable bunch. And dragons, but dragons weren't real according to Suchi. Deidara didn't care though, he thought them as amazing and ruled the air with their powerful wings, they were free!

Sometimes Deidara thought that if he were a dragon or a bird, he would escape Iwa and fly wherever he wished.

The sun was setting lower, blue sky turning a violet- orange quickly. Any other day, Deidara would have painted the beautiful scene, but today he had his eyes set out on the new creature in distress. Deidara frowned. He stripped on of his hands of the leather gloves, face contorting in disgust at the small pool of saliva that flung on the wall. The glove thumped softly on the rock floor and he pressed a tiny finger to the window. It was ice cold.

He made a decision to open the window, thrusting a tan arm outside. The bird screeched and Deidara clumsily reached for it with his gloved hand. It jumped away, nearly tumbling off the sill. "Come here! I want to help!" He grunted, pushing onto his tip toes and grabbing the birds neck. It pecked at his hand and its nips would have been painful, if not for the thick glove. For once, Deidara was glad he wore them. Once he successfully had the bird inside his room, Deidara slammed the window close and sat criss crossed on the cold floor. He cupped his other hand around the birds torso, shushing the winged creature, but with no avail at lulling it to a calm state. It began to become loud, and Deidara did not want anyone to come to his room. "please be quiet, un…" This was his bird. He wanted it to be his treasure.

He was unable to make the bird silent, and the bird still struggled. It was when the birds beak pinched harshly at his other hand. "Ouch!" He squealed, flinging the animal up. The sharp claws on the feet came dangerously close to the blondes icy eyes and swiped down with the body and ran down, straight through the boys eyelid and creating three long gashes. He cried out and pressed his gloved hand to his eye. He choked on the sob that was persistent in escaping his throat. The blood was gushing from his eye and he couldn't open the now damaged blue orb. He pushed back the pain and watched the bird as it also writhed in agony.

The bird flailed on the ground. Deidara stood back as the animal suffered on the rock. He felt ashamed at causing the animal such harm and agony. The animal seemed to slow down and ended up face towards Deidara and the window. The bird, exhausted, seemed to be staring out the window now.

Deidara walked slowly to the pigeon. He watched as the whole scraggly body tensed with every step he took. When he was at a foots distance from it, he sat down and looked to the window, then the bird.

"I'm sorry, un." He whispered, resting his chin on his two bony knees. Uncomfortable In the positiong, he sat criss crossed.

The animal was breathing harshly, shaking. Deidara exhaled, his attempts at ignoring the throbbing under his eye impossible. He refused though, to go for help. He felt the warm blood trickle down his cheek. A soft, but thick thump was heard as it dripped down. He cried, salty tears stinging at his eyes.

A few moments went by as he let the pain flow through his face. It was either a teardrop or blood hitting his skinny leg that made him jump. A soft chirp called out and Deidara turned his whole head to the bird, covering his eye as the pain turned dull at last. It hurt to touch, but he could manage.

The Pigeon looked dead. It wasn't though. It seemed to be struggling for breath now and its black eyes were drooping, heavy. Deidara reached out for it with his ungloved hand, bleeding from the gashes from the pigeons beak. The bird flinched as he touched its soft feathers.

"Soft, un." He whispered, continuing his soft petting. He frowned as he felt the crust of blood at the edges of a wing. He lifted it gently and was surprised to hear the clinking of a glass case no bigger than his ring finger.. Curious, he reached for the glass case, seeing a small slip of paper and a ball of an object that was round and grey. The bird seemed to wake from its near death and Deidara jerked back as the pigeon went ballistic, squawking and chirping, flitting about and struggling to move on the floor.

Deidara watched in disturbed horror as the birds last few minutes were spent suffering, even though death was eminent. The pigeon began to seize and blood began to pour from its mouth. Soon, it died and Deidara stood there, traumatized. He squeezed the glass and gasped for breath that he had not known he was holding inside his lungs. Deidara lowered his gloved hand from his eye, the area caked with blood. He took the small lid from the glass container and flipped it upside down, letting the paper and grey object fall into his hand.

He squinted at the note, sighing when he was unable to read what it said except a few words. "Clay…" He whispered one of the words. Deidara looked to the grey ball. The blonde walked to the tiny dresser, stepping over the bird. The blood would certainly stain the rock floor. He shoved the note in the corner of the drawer and closed it shut.

He turned and leaned against the dresser, sliding down. He looked at the bird and then the clay. He clenched his hand quickly, feeling the squishy substance against his palm resist to the pressure he applied. He opened his hand and smiled. It was like a picture of his glove. Leaning in, he could see every detail that was on his glove, indented onto the clay.

As the minutes went on, he played with the clay casually, making silly things out of it. He silently thanked bird for his new toy, realizing then that he still had a dead bird in his room, staining the floor with its blood. He looked up and flinched as he remembered his injured eye. He frowned guiltily at the animal that he had meant to save.

Deidara jumped when he heard the door of his room being knocked on. He brushed long hair in front of his eye and remorsefully shoved the birds body under his bed. He was making sure that not a feather was in sight before the door opened up gently. His eye was completely covered.

Rin, the guard he had pulled his hands prank on, pushed the door open. After Deidara 'foolishly', as Onoki had put it lately due to his growing stress, showed him the atrocious mouths on Deidaras hands, he had been assigned to watch and take care of specifically. The soon to be fully grown male was to be around Deidara at nearly all times and had almost no time to himself or others to gossip. The Tsuchikage had begun to grow cold with the months, the pressure of Iwa weighing on his aging shoulders.

"Is everything alright, Deidara?" He asked solemnly. He knew the boy barely left his room lately.

"Hai, un."

"Alright. I heard some ruckus, so I'm just making sure."

"I'm okay, un." He wasn't. His eye had begun to sting once more."

Rin nodded, then leaned on the doorway. "I was in a meeting with Onoki." He waited for the boys excitement. His eye opened slightly, but the joy that had once been in Onokis name had apparently lost its glory. Deidara waited on more expectantly. "He said he wants you to be in school soon."

This was new, Deidara had been home schooled with Rin since he had turned six, what had made the old man think he was able to go to school, of course it was more of Rin teaching him to throw things.

"He thinks you're ready to start training there." Rin smiled. Deidara looked blankly at him. "I've told him great things about you, he says that if you do good on the entrance exams for the fourth years, you would be able to play with the big kids."

Deidara frowned. "I haven't read any books and I-"

Rin laughed. "don't worry about it Dei, you have amazing accuracy. Things aren't as textbook here anymore." Deidara nodded and Rin stood there silently, waiting for anything from Deidara. Nothing.

Rin waved and said goodnight, looking back once more at Deidara. "Dei, is something wrong with your eye?"

Deidaras heart thumped harshly in his chest.. "No, un." The crevasses of his body were heated and up and causing him to sweat by now. Rins presence didn't normally bother him, but he had chosen a bad time for Deidara to come in and talk.

The brunette hesitated before closing the door. Deidara gave a short sigh. He looked over to his bed, crawling to it and pulling the deceased bird from under it. By then he only had the moonlight to serve as his light in the dark. The only light came from the halls, Deidaras and many other rooms being left to the dark after the sunset. He cringed as his hand hit the birds feet and he quickly tugged it forward. The bird was the same as it had died, but it would soon start to rot and stink. Deidara knew he couldn't sneak the bird out, too many people. Deidara bit his lip, then looked out to the moonlit sky. Where the bird belonged.

It was a sight to be seen as Deidara stood on the sill of his window, one hand cradled the bird and the other having a death grip on the wall. He was crying, crying for the bird, for killing it. Deidara felt tears fall down his cheeks and he shivered as it chilled his cheeks with the wind. The Tsuchikage home was the tallest building, further up the rocky mountain than any other in the city of Iwa.

The sky was clear of any clouds and Deidara wondered if the bird enjoyed flying on these nights before he tossed the bird in the air. He closed his eyes, believing that the bird soared and that it hadn't died.

To him, the bird would fly forever.

The next day, Deidara asked Rin about death. He looked expectantly, hair half up, but fringe still in place in front of the damaged eye. He had snuck to the wash room during the early AM hours. He kept it closed, even though he was able to open it slightly and see after cleaning it thoroughly. The clay was now tucked in his own small pouch he had begun to carry. The note was also in the pouch. He didn't want anyone to find it so he decided to begin carrying it wherever he went. He had barely touched the clay.

"Well, it's hard to explain. I suppose you could call it fleeting."

"Fleeting? Like instant, un?" Deidara and Rin walked to their usual training grounds.

"I suppose something like that." Rin shrugged. "We all die, enjoy it while you last, you know?" Rin felt somewhat uncomfortable at this knew topic that Deidara had become interested in.

Deidara frowned and walked in thought. Rin stopped. "I guess that answer doesn't please you, does it?"

Deidara shrugged. "I actually like it, un."

"But?"

"I don't want to die on someone else's hands, Rin." Deidara held back tears. "I want to know when I die." He thought of how the bird. Deidara blamed himself for that. It's death was slow, painful.

Rin frowned. "What do you mean?"

The small boy shrugged and played with the edges of his gloves. "I would rather kill myself than have someone else kill me."

Rin scowled. "What about when you have to go into battle? You can't just give up when someone comes at you."

"I know, un! It's just.." He knew he couldn't explain how he felt to Rin when he didn't understand either just yet.

They stopped talking and Rin watched the boy closely, ushering him to come with him.

Deidara never went out of the Kage tower unless it was to train. He would often watch from his window at night the slow bustling of people and travelers who would stop for a moments rest to recover from the long journey through the canyon. Today the sky was dull and cloudy, Deidara could smell the rain in the air and it was becoming humid and sticky. There were people pushing through the streets and carts being pulled through the narrow walkway. The city was compacted tightly in a hidden area that most people were not able to make without an escort, the travel to Iwa was dangerous.

Deidara was fascinated by the height of the Kage tower, looking back occasionally as they traveled downwards through the city and to the training grounds. It was always a troublesome way back up after the long training, but Rin told him he'd probably do much more when he was older.

When they reached the edge of the city, it began to sprinkle. Rin squinted at the sky. "We wont train but for a couple hours, I'm positive the The Tsuchikage would not enjoy you catching illness." Deidara nodded, the old mans name making him catch a short splash of anxiety and hurt. He began to feel hot and wiped a few beads of sweat from his forehead.

There were not many people at the training grounds, as it was actually not well known to many people, most children being taught to throw at the school and older ninja taken deeper into the mountains for more challenging practice and advanced combat. Iwas' protective system lived on Gorilla warfare, using the rocky land to their advantage.

Deidara reached for the kunai knives that Rin kept in his pocket, but Rin held them up to where he couldn't reach them.

"Deidara."

The blonde waited. "Yes, un?"

Rin sighed, handing the blonde the kunai knives.

"I'll tell you when you're older. Now let's begin."

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	3. Chapter 3

Here's the next chapter, but read the authors note at the bottom, I have a huge surprise there. 3

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He practiced for hours hours, throwing the kunai relentlessly. His aim was off slightly, but only Deidara could tell. Rin had taken to watching the sky as it began to cloud up even more. Deidara was sweating harshly under his arms and back. He felt gross and the humidity made his body sticky. His small body was beginning to wear out due to his constant throwing, running back and forth to get the kunai, and Rins telling him to run and throw. Deidara had hit the target at times, but it was exhausting and Rin told him to stop, and just stick to standing and concentrating. Deidara held three of the kunai in his sweaty hands and focused on the dummy. He took a deep breath and threw the kunai one by one at the target, hitting it all three times as close to the middle as he could.

"Good job!" Rin said, clapping from his spot. He gave Deidara a thumbs up and laughed. "See? I told you, you have amazing aim!" He walked slowly to the blonde, his feet lightly scraping against the rock. Deidara became slightly aware of the silence the two were surrounded by. "I'm sure you will be fine taking the entrance test."

Deidara was out of breath. He sighed, letting the hot air invade his lungs, uncomfortable as it was. The boy looked to the ground. "Rin, I don't know if I-" He flinched as a hand grasped his shoulder.

"Deidara."

Said boy looked up to the brunette. "You're going to get in. You are amazingly skilled, all we have to work on is your hand to hand combat. And even if you don't do well with hand to hand combat, you will still probably will get accepted."

Deidara cocked his head. He did think it would be fun to work with other people finally, but he was nervous. "I don't know how-"

"Deidara, just have confidence. Can you do that? You really do have potential." Rin promised. He had high hopes for Deidara. He had told Deidara the truth about everything. Almost.

Deidara smiled and nodded. "I can do that, un."

Rin beamed, then did something that surprised Deidara. He took his hands. Even though Deidara had his gloves on, he still was shocked that Rin, somebody who knew about the hands on his palms, would touch his hands, and so affectionately Deidara looked to the larger, tan hands, then to Rin. He was still smiling. "I believe in you."

Deidara nodded and swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded. He was unable to express his feelings in words, instead grinning silly. He smiled and let out a small giggle. Rin laughed back, happy to hear the blonde laughing. It had made him angry that the Tsuchikage had broken the boys heart, but Rin felt if he worked hard enough he would get that prankster back that he had first met in the hallway. Rin grasped one of the gloved hands tightly and tugged on the small arm. "Come on, were leaving. I'll go to the sign ups tomorrow and we'll start more advanced training."

"Like what, un?" Deidara asked. He imagined himself as a strong ninja, a jounin, saving lives and earning respect from everyone. Maybe Onoki would accept him, Maybe he would apologize, beg for Deidaras forgiveness. Say that Deidara was just like everyone else. Maybe Deidara could forgive him, get on his knees and kiss his feet-

Deidara shook the thought away and crossed his eyes. His heart was beating fast and he felt shame at his thoughts. Why would he think such a thing? He gnawed on his lip at the degrading idea of the Tsuchikage doing something so weak. He jumped at a deep voice;Rin was talking and he hadn't noticed. Deidara tuned back into the conversation, looking up at the brunette.

"-we need to work on your speed and combat skills, then there's throwing things at moving objects, or while you're moving. I'm sure you will do fine with that if we work on your stamina."

Deidara nodded and Rin smiled at the boys now determined face, but there was something else the boys eye showed that Rin couldn't place. He left it alone and they packed their things in his bag.

They began their trip up to the city, the clouds were dark and gloomy. Deidara felt cool drops on his cheek and looked up. The sky was beginning to release a gentle and cool sprinkling. Deidara walked faster along with Rin and he reached in his bag, playing with the glass tube that held his new toy.

Rin gasped and twisted to Deidara causing the boy to jump in shock. Deidara pulled his hand from inside the leather snapped his bag shut."One more thing! The observers, They love to see when you can perform your own style jutsu! It shows how advanced and creative you can be." Rin winked. "Just a little hint."

Deidara nodded confidently, deciding to leave to his clay alone until they got home. They walked at a brisk pace up the tough terrain. Deidara slipped at one time and Rin had to catch him. "Be careful Dei, it's getting dangerous." Deidara nodded and they continued on.

The sprinkle was slowly advancing into a hard drizzle. The wind was beginning to chill and soft rumbles of thunder above in the near black cloads foreshadowed a dangerous storm. "Come on." Rin mumbled. "I don't like the looks of these clouds." They sped up, Rin heaving the boys weight up over tall jumps so he wouldn't slip again. Eventually, sure enough, the drizzle was turning into buckets. The wind blew harder and the sky grew to near night time color. A dark, dreading look.

Rin began to curse to himself. "Deidara, we need to hurry," he breathed. Deidara held Rins hand, clinging to death. He had always hated storms. By the time they hit the main road the rain had begun to fall monsoon-like.

"Shit." Rin grunted as lightning flashed, the thunder clap almost deafening in the canyon like rock. Wind began to swish their clothes and Deidara whimpered at the clap of the sharp, deafening thunder, booming through the atmosphere like a bomb. Deidara whimpered and squeezed his eye shut tightly. His damaged eye twitched in pain. There was another strike of lightning that hit the ground near them and Rin covered Deidaras ears, but the boy still could hear the thunder that cut through the air.

The blonde began to cry, his eardrums ringing.

Rin couldn't hear, it was just blank noise. He squeezed Deidara and they sprinted off, running as fast as they could. They were exhausted and Rin regretted ever stepping outside.

They reached the entrance of Iwa, stopping just before. "Rin, un?" He yelled.

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"Fucking hell." Rin muttered under his breath.

They had reached Iwa, only to find that it had been blocked off by a giant rock. "Kami.." He looked around the rock, squinting. The rain was painfully cold and he was becoming worried for their lives as nobody came to help them."Help!" He screamed, holding the small boy against his soaked chest. Deidara had begun shivering long ago. The rain was sharp, it hit his body like cold sinbon. Rin bit his lip and covered his face from the cold rain. There were no guards on patrol, all had left to safety probably knowing that the storm would be bad.

"Shit." Rin cursed loudly. He pulled at his hair. He knew that if he didn't act quick that they would die. "Damnit, Deidara, go over there! Quick!"

Deidara nodded nervously, running to a slightly sheltered area in the rock about two hundred feet away.

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Onoki stormed the halls of the Kage tower, guards following him. "Are you sure the perimeter was searched thoroughly?" He barked, pausing to look out the window of the second floor.

"We searched them as long as the storm would hold. Everyone is underground and the towns buildings are secure." One guard said back to him.

"You know that this rock is full of minerals and metals that thunder just loves to eat up at." Onoki growled.

"Yes sir."

He turned around and scowled to the guards. "Seal this cave, tightly. I don't even want a speck of electricity to make its way in here."

"YES SIR!" The guards bellowed.

BOOM!

Onoki flinched at the deafening noise, as did the rest of the upper ranking jounin. the glass to the window shattered and a Onoki shuddered as chakra seeped inside the hallway. "What.. The hell was that?" He said. They ran from the staircase and Onoki looked out the window. There, far to the entrance of Iwa, a mushroom cloud was expanding to the dark sky.

Onoki turned to the guards. "Go. Now, see what, or who, caused that explosion." He growled.

The Guards nodded and opened the window, jumping out into the storm. A blast of cold air swooshed in and Onoki closed the window, his short body anything but weak. He successfully locked the door and watched as the smoke cloud rained down rocks and other debris from the watch towers on each entrance side. He knew that it was explosion jutsu due to the burst of chakra that swept through the air.

"Tsuchikage sama!" Suchi was running up the stairs of the underground safety shelter.

"What the hell is wrong with you? Go back down!" The old man pointed to the door and scowled at the old woman. "We have a dangerous storm on our hands a possible attack of our won-"

"It's Rin! Rin, he's not here, or Deidara!" Suchi cried out, her hands shaking and tear streaks down her face. "I cant find them, not anywhere." She grabbed the old mans shoulders and shook the Tsuchikage. Onoki pushed against her as she mumbled about her blonde baby, plying her fingers out of his clothing. He backed away from the worried old woman, glancing to the cloud of dust.

"It's better off we not wait for them." He said dryly. "Go. I have other worries than a child and and his tutor."

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Rin looked back to Deidara and to the large wall of rock that acted as a blockade, preventing the two to get into safety. "Don't move!" He hollered.

Deidara watched intently, his hair whipped around him and the rain soaked his body. He was cold, and he wondered if the Tsuchikage knew they weren't there. He shivered violently and

Rin took two deep breaths and pressed his hands against the harsh rock. He focused his chakra on the rock and began to push into the stone. The thunder made him jump and the lightning was traveling fast to Iwa. Rin focused harder, if they didn't they would definitely be caught in the storm for good. His energy was depleting and it was getting hard to see as his chakra was forced into the rock. He hissed gently as the rock began to heat as his chakra spread through it. When he couldn't release anymore chakra, Rin stepped back and looked at the large wall and turned to run. He held one hand up and once he reached Deidara he snatched the boy up, sprinting further away. Deidara looked over Rins shoulder, teeth chattering and out of breath.

"KATSU!"

The wall exploded into oblivion, red and orange flames going out of the atmosphere The chakra expelled from it, creating bright neon lights that danced with the smoke, circling the grey clouds and eventually drifting off into the sky. His fingers tingled through the gloves and he could feel the mouths on his palms moving rabidly. Deidara was, to say the least, amazed. It was bright, it was hot, it was fleeting, it was loud.

_ It was art._

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Alright so I'm gonna pause on this story for a little while..

That is..

Unless I get ten reviews..

*avoids Fangirls* Yah yah, I'm not gonna stop WRITING it, just uploading ;P I have another chapter halfway finished.


	4. Chapter 4

Im so sorry for your wait. I had finals and gradtuated high school and driving and blah blah.

Still love me? Plus this chapter sucks and ugughuhguhgkjsbkjcnszlmwcuiadnkasncoqw...

Good.

Bitches. READ AUTHORS NOTE AT BOTTOM.

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The air was cool and the short blonde hair sifted against its will, no longer weighed down by its length. The river before him was clear and blue, a man made river that had been built for the city. It wasn't far from Iwa, and it attracted more wildlife for the town. The sky was set to a perfect blue and not a single cloud in the sky. It was a perfect day.

It had been 5 months since the storm, enough time for his eye to heal, even though his vision was slightly blurred and a tiny pink scar ran down the blue orb, although not visible unless you were intimately close. He was lucky that it had healed, considering the academy had demanded he cut it after being accepted into the fifth years.

The boy stretched slowly, releasing the tension in his body. The blonde had just been released from the school, plenty of homework and training to do, but he wanted to relax. The Tsuchikage would scold him on his lolling around later, but it didn't matter. He had everything now. Deidara smiled and laid down on his back, closing his eyes softly. Without looking he removed his glove and threw it to the side, and shoved a hand into his satchel. The blonde sighed as his hand squeezed soft clay.

And all because of his new art.

-four months ago-

"Hey, Rin, un?" It was nearly a month after the storm and Deidara and Rin had moved to a new training grounds that was located more in Iwa's borders, although still was empty half the time they went there. The two were eating lunch now, sitting on a soft blanket that the cook had sewn for Deidara after the storm.

Rin sipped from his canteen and looked to the boy. "What is it, Dei?" He wiped his mouth of the water and waited.

Deidara shifted into a criss cross position. "You told me that in order to help me get into the higher graded academy that I'd have to make my own type of fighting style, un. Right?"

"Oh, no, I mean you don't have to!" Rin laughed. "I mean, it's nice is all. I'm sure if you're good at fighting they would accept you, which you are."

Deidara scowled, crossing his skinny arms and looking down at his toes. "Yeah, but I haven't even fought anyone, un."

"What!?" Rin gasped. "Those logs are pretty feisty, you know!"

"Riiin!" Deidara held back a small giggle.

Rin laughed at the boy who had begun to scoot closer slowly to him. "Alright, alright. I know, I'm protective."

A breeze kicked up the blanket slightly and the sky was slightly clouded. It was a good day.

"Well, I know that." Deidara laughed, showing his teeth. "But I didn't want to fight anyone anyway, un." Deidara nearly demanded. His face turned determined and he clenched his tiny gloved fists. "I want your help making my own style!" He then beamed. "And I want you to teach me the explosion jutsu!"

Rin raised his brows. "Really?"

"Yes, un!"

Rin sighed and ran a hand through his long ponytail. The boy was young, and it was probably illegal to teach such a child to use a dangerous jutsu. Of course the boy was determined and smart, plus his smile was like a gem. Rare and beautiful. But…

"No." Rin shook his head and picked up his food quickly. He refused to see the heartbreak on the boys face.

"Riin, un!" The boy begged. A tiny hand grabbed his shirt and pulled him back. "Please?"

Rin was shocked that the boy was being insistent, but he still shook his head. "It's too dangerous."

Deidara ran in front of the taller ninja and he jumped up and down. "Please please please, un?!"

Rin nearly laughed at the boy. He was acting like a child and it was too adorable.

"What if I had an idea to make it not dangerous, un!" Deidara punched the Ninja lightly in the stomach. "Listen to me, un.!"

Rin stopped and closed his eyes. He sighed and kneeled down. inwardly scolding himself for falling to the boys new childlike habits, but also was curious to hear the boys idea. "Fine. I'll listen." He ruffled the long blond hair. "But hurry, qwe have to head home soon."

Deidara sat down on the ground, reaching into his pocket and taking a piece of clay from the small amount he had left with his experiments.

"Watch, un" He whispered.

And Rin did. His eyes widening at the small and brief performance.

Deidara sat beside Rin and molded the tiny piece of clay in his hand. Rin watched and watched as the tiny shape turned into a small bug. He raised his brows and praised the boys artwork in his head, but still confused. That is, until Deidara opened his hands out to the air and the bug jumped from his palm. Rin blinked in confusion. Had he just seen that correctly? Rin turned to the boy, his own mouth agape as Deidaras was spread into a toothy grin. "Deidara, how did you…"

"Rin, un!" Deidara shushed the older ninja, not once moving his eye from the quickly crawling bug. Deidara bit his lip and went into a stance, his body going tense, and then with one single hand motion his eyes squeezed shut and he used a single hand signal. One that was familiar to the explosion corps.

"Katsu! Un."

It wasn't as big an explosion as the one that he had performed, but it was impressive size. It wasn't bright, surprisingly, and the little amount of fire that did come from the small bug went about twenty feet as smoke drifted up around the air, chakra sweeping and sifting in it just as his explosion did. The force of it sent his clothing flying around his body, and it was loud. Rin looked to the blonde, long golden hair flying gently behind him as his blue eye took in the whole scene. He seemed to be in a daze, as if the explosion put the young boy into a state of awe.

"Dei?"

His name seemed to snap him out of his hypnosis. Rins ears rang gently, but he was used to it.

"Hai, un?"

Rin coughed as smoke traveled into their area and he waved his hands around to get out of it. "How" Coughing. " in Kamis name did you do that?" He looked to the small crater that was created from the bomb.

"I made it, un!" Deidara giggled and looked into the sky, the smoke not bothering him. Rin crossed his eyes at the boy.

"You.. you played around with explosives?" Rin was angry that the boy had put his own life in danger, but amazed at the same time. Deidara, it seemed, had more brain power than half of the jounin in Iwa. The longer he stared at the boy, the more his grin faded. "That's.. so dangerous.." He attempted keeping his voice lowered. "Do you know what kind of danger that could have brought to you? You could have died!" Rin pulled at his braid. "Dei," Rin sighed, rubbing his eyes. The smoke had made them itch, oddly enough. He should be used to such things. "How did you do it?"

"It was... my first try, un.." Deidara mumbled, playing with his gloved fingers.

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OKAY. So I know I havent updated at all lately, but I've been very busy. now that I'm on summer break things will change, but first i need you guys to review on what i should update next, I'm stuck on Bet on it and would love some help, so message me please. Thank you. 3


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